I got back to work today after the small vacation that I took last weekend. Well the place was very hot and humid, I must have lost atleast a couple of pounds of weight. I took time to go to the beach near my house and tried to take some pictures of the waves as they crashed against the rocks. I tried different aperture and shutter combinations. unfortunately it looks like the film might have skipped a sprocket or so while i was loading it and...none of the images have come out, none! not one goddamn photo......can u beleive that?

I feel horrible. I'd taken so many snaps. When my friend was down here after two long years I took quite a few at his place, then when my granny came visiting us, then I took some pictures of children, and of the beach and all that. Now to think that none of them will see the light of day, oh ! its very sad.

Well I guess I've learnt one costly lesson. Hope I learn more lessons, but none so costly. Its like those moments that I tried to freeze in my memory have managed to slip away. Pictures I so longed to see have just ceased to be. Neither will I get to re-live those times nor will a piece of time, that I tried to catch, remain in my hands.

Well its wednesday the 1st of April. I've just come into work. The weather is cooler today, thanks to the showers that we have beeen experiencing in the past couple of days. I'm going to my native place tomorrow night. Have to take my granny back to our ancestral home. I think I'll be spending a couple of days there and then head back home.

I have been thinking a lot these days, and there seems to be no end to it. Sometimes I wonder is there is any need to think this much. Things dont seem to be going my way. I'm lost in thought most of the time.

Where is my life headed? God! this confusion is maddening. Will I get over this, will I find what I need the most? I never used to think so much before. When I was young all I wanted to do was have fun, nothing in the world around worrried me. Nothing anyone said or thought about me affected me. Now, its not the case.

I think I care more about somethings these days and thats beginning to affect me. I wonder if its ok, cause i've never felt this way before.

I just dont feel like writing anymore. Guess I'll just come back a little later.